Ok gang, for the 3 of you still hanging in there for new blog posts (jk my following is growing exponentially, make sure you share my blog NOW, while you can still claim to have gotten in before it was big), here’s part 3 of my trip to Scotland. If you missed the first 2, here’s a brief recap:
-Me and Rich flew to Scotland and met up with our Scottish friend Laura
-We got drunk all day
Yeah hm that’s all that’s happened, in 2 whole posts. This blog is like a really well-crafted, detailed TV show. Like it’s not about the plot, it’s about this highly curated, engrossing, transportative experience.
Ok right so we got up the next day after all 3 of us sleeping crowded together in Laura’s childhood bed. Laura’s mom made us a class Scottish breakfast which was fried eggs, fried bacon, fried sausages, black pudding which is like fried pigs blood, fried mushrooms, and a few other fried things. I don’t remember much about this breakfast but I did write a note in my journal, which says “Laura Mom breakfast (bad).”
Laura’s mom, who’s retired, drove the 3 of us around to some sightseeing in Edinburgh. We saw Rosslyn Chapel from the gates because we were all too cheap to buy a ticket, then walked around some little town where we found this authentic phone booth:
I felt kind of sick from the night before and mostly just wanted to take a shit. Laura fed me some god-awful Scottish candy while we walked around in the rain and looked at some bridges and had her mom take photos of us.
This great trip was capped off with a visit to Blackness Castle. During the half mile walk from the car, it started raining super hard, so after we got to the castle we promptly turned around and walked back in a pelting downpour:
That night, Laura treated us to yet more of Scotland’s finest cuisine, aka some shitty late night place to get deep-fried pizza and chicken nuggets. I’m pretty sure Scottish people basically just ate fatty fried food for every single meal, like Americans without guilt or fitness trends or Tender Greens. Afterwards, we went to a bar that just happened to be having Ceilidh, which is the Scottish square dance Laura had tried to take us to the night prior. Laura was super excited, I think because she felt like she’d finally taken us to something in Scotland that was actually like, culturally Scottish. It was pretty fun; it was mainly a bunch of drunk tourists not listening to the instructions and fucking it all up, but I can see why people would seek it out, before grinding was an option.
The next day, Thursday, (Day 3 of the trip) Laura had an interview, so me and Rich made the most of the day, by sleeping until noon. But we seized the day around 1 pm to check out Edinburgh Castle, which was cool. Rich, naive tourist, outside the U.S. for the first time, shelled out $18 for the shitty tour booklet, and also bought himself a cool snowglobe and a teddy bear.
We felt we’d had a pretty full day after that, so we got coffee. And there, me and Rich found out it was our Facebook 10-year friend-versary! Best part of the trip, honestly, was just sharing this milestone of friendship with my good buddy Rich. We’ve been friends since first year of college, and boy, have we had some times! But that’s another story, for another blog.
After celebrating, we went to get haggis, a classic Scottish dish made of mashed potatoes and, like, minced sheep organs, which sounds gross but is actually just super bland. Me and Rich did get some great artistic shots for one another’s Tinders, though:
Laura finally got back into town at 5:30, and now she was hungry (provides a lot of problems rather than solutions, for a country guide, doesn’t she?) so we went to another Scottish standby, McDonalds, where we had what was, honestly, one of the best meals of the whole trip:
After that we went to Edinburgh’s #1 tourist destination: a statue of America’s own Abe Lincoln, where I was able to pay my respects to an American hero:
Then we went to the top of some hill where we actually did get some really exceptional shots.
On the way back I finally I actually did get this one good shot of Edinburgh, which Laura two days later stole from me and posted on her Instagram, as if she hasn’t lived there for her entire fucking life:
That night we took a bus to Glasgow, which we were to use as a jumping-off point for sightseeing around there. We made the bus with about 30 seconds to spare (we’d been busy playing about 3 hours of charades), and met up with Laura’s English boyfriend, Chris, whose apartment we were staying at. We stayed up till 4 am playing fishbowl. Really good use of our time.
So for those keeping track at home, here’s our trip so far
Day 1 (Tuesday): arrived, drank and walked around Edinburgh
Day 2 (Wednesday): Went to castles and sightseeing stuff with Laura’s mom (actually good touristy day)
Day 3 (Thursday): Went to Edinburgh castle, ate Mcdonalds, had a friend-versary, played charades for a combined total of like 9 hours
It was a good thing Rich was traveling with me and Laura, two seasoned travelers, or he probably would have made rookie mistakes that kept him from making the most of his time.
See you next time!